Just an (over)-thought.

I went to the sushi place next door during my break today and had an unagi don for the first time. It wasn't intentional-- I actually ordered a "tuna don" but I guess they heard "unagi don" instead. I am a creature of habit so I decided that this was a good time to finally try something new AND it was their daily special and came with free miso soup. Score!

I knew perfectly well what unagi is as the word had been permanently embedded in my head after that episode of Friends when Ross kept saying it. Eel. But I was feeling brave and it was covered in teriyaki sauce and sesame seeds and looked really appetizing. It was tasting really good at first. Different texture, but good nonetheless. Anyway, as I was eating, K gives me a call and I share with him my enlightenment.

L: Guess what? I'm having unagi for the first time.
K: Yummy! How are you liking it?
L: It's actually pretty good, I'm surprised.
K: It is good. I usually have to lie to my friends to even get them to try it. They like it but when they find out what it is, they don't want to eat it anymore.
L: Over-thinking ruins food. Just close your eyes, put it in your mouth and enjoy.
K: That's what she said!

After the phone call, I started thinking about eels. How slimy they are... how wiggly they are... how gross they looked alive. And All of a sudden, the unagi I was eating wasn't so appetizing anymore. I thought my throat was getting electrically shocked as it went down and it kind of made me want gag. I had two morsels of it left and I hate to waste food, so I just shoved it in my mouth and chased it down with my free miso soup. Needless to say, I won't be ordering it again anytime soon.

Anyway, this had me thinking (perhaps over-thinking) about how we much we enjoy something and we ruin it by over-analyzing it. This happens to everything: food, drinks, life, experiences and of course, relationships. I am guilty of being a repeat offender of this heinous crime. I know how loca I can get when I'm in a relationship. (Hey now, admitting is the first step to recovery.)

The scene goes something like this: Everything is going so well in your new relationship. You become comfortable and just so used to certain things: wake up calls, texts checkin' on you throughout the day, good night calls etc. These things become routine-- they become expected. Then you have a busy week and there's just no time for these petty and trivial things. Then you start to trip: Why didn't he wake me up this morning? Does he not care? He isn't texting me as often! Where is he and who is he fucking? He didn't put a heart at the end of his texts! He must not love me anymore! LOCA. I TOLD YOU. Because up until this point, there was NOTHING that would have made you think this otherwise.

As psycho as I am, I don't blast out all these irrational thoughts of mine and I don't act upon the crazy ball-bustin', go-ape-shit urges I get (ex: busting down the door of his house ready to crack a beer bottle on his face). Instead, I keep them locked up in my mind where they float around and drive me even craaaaaaazier.

I do pride myself for not acting out irrationally. Slap me if I ever do. But then again, I also think, "hell, slap me for even thinking these in the first place!" You end drive yourself over the edge with your unreasonable assumptions, that next time you end up reading into everything that proves your accusation and ignore the rest that don't. Insecurities. Jealousy. Gut feelings. These thoughts come from everywhere and we can't help it. We're girls. We all do it. I bet even the flyest, most confident chick does it from time-to-time too.

I'm not saying that these thoughts are always bad. Sometimes gut feelings are there for a reason and you shouldn't turn a blind eye to things that are legit deal-breakers. It's just when we let these thoughts run wild and ruin a perfectly good thing because of it, that we have a problem.

Before you go jumping and beating on your man for not returning your phone call immediately, STOP YOURSELF. SLAP YOURSELF. CHECK YOURSELF. Unless there's reason AND EVIDENCE for you to believe otherwise; most of the time, it's all in our heads. He's probably sleeping in this morning and you woke up before him. He's probably busy cramming for an exam to text you. And he didn't put a heart because he wanted to tell you he loved you out loud.

Sometimes ignorance is bliss, especially when it comes to these whack-ass thoughts.